i woke up like at 8 am 2day, with a little bit of a hangover, not 2 bad but still i could feel the effects of it, so i decided 2 roll a joint. While i was smoking it my friend woke up, he said that the smell of burning pot chased him into his dreams haha, i found it funny... Later after having breakfast we went 2 buy some shit that his mother needed 4 her business. After we were done, my friend moishe arrived at my place, we all smoked 2 gether and moishe told us that 2 day it was new year`s eve 4 him (he is jewish), bastard... he probably is drinking and having fun with his friends haha...
Anyways, after dropping my friend at his house, i got 2 mine`s, where i recieved a rather interesting phone call. it was her and i didnt see that coming.
I dont know whats going on in her head, i dont even know if she feels the same way i do, sometimes i look at the situation and i think that maybe theres something that can be done, but some other i just laugh about the thought of something happening between us... Its been a while since i had this kinda thoughts about some1, i fucking hate the fact that she has 2 come 2 my mind every single second, i cannot live with it. Sometimes my dreams r free of her, but there is always the chance of her being there,in my dreams, it haunts me everywhere, its turning into a freaking demon 4 fuck sakes!
I also have 2 do something about it i guess... So now i am gonna take a shower, and go out with my mastas, and lets see in what trouble we get into this time..

A week left untill my b-day... a week left untill i become 19, and i wonder if i`ve used my time right... Am i satisfied with what i have done over the years?, if i die 2 day, could i say that my life is complete, that i have done everything that i wanted, and that i dont feel the need of doing more? fuck it, obviously not i am very young, it would be very depressant to think of another answer. I guess you can never say that u r complete though, that u r satisfied with what u have done, and in a way, its kinda sad the fact that u might never be complete... That feeling i get when i think about it has the power 2 drive me mad, to feel so fucking despaired that i can hardly breath, or move. What has 2 be done 2 feel that hole?. I cant tell you, u have 2 find it by your own, and for sure it wont be easy, it takes a lot of time 2 figure it out, hopefully i`ll fully understand what i need, and hopefully i`ll do everything i can to make it happen...

It was a hard day 2day, my mom recieved its results back from the laboratory, and it doesnt seem right, we will have 2 wait untill the next week 2 find out whats wrong, but certainly looks bad, hopefully we will be able 2 do something about it. Also my dog scaped from our home , but we were able 2 find him, after hours of looking 4 him, since it rained, he was all wet, and dirty, and by the look on his face, he was scared haha. I found my good friend Ramona from switzerland its coming to mexico, yay!!! we will have a blast 4 sure, she is so great!!!.We went downtown and we bought some nice quality weed, altgough it was kinda xpensive, it was worth it, my friend decided 2 spend the night at my place, so we bought a couple of beers, and then we got home, and i talked to memo he was online, he told me about this and i decided 2 give it a shot... I have a joint of the weed we bought today, its right by my side,and i am just waiting to finish this so i can light it up and lay down the bed, while i listen 2 the electrypnose ambient album, wich its great. So i`ll be posting more of my life, even though i dont know who might be reading this, i dont really care. Just wanted 2 share this with allof you, who took the time 2 read all my bullshit ;) thanx 4 doing it :P.

Current Mood: calm